A Weekly Check-In to Strengthen Your Relationship: Therapist-Recommended Tools for Couples
As a couples therapist, one of the most common questions I hear is:
“How can we stay connected between sessions?”
Whether you’re navigating conflict, deepening your intimacy, or simply trying to make space for more intentional conversations, a weekly check-in can help you build the habits that create long-term connection.
That’s why I created the The Talking Ritual with our Couples Communication Starter Pack—a curated set of tools I regularly recommend to clients in couples counseling. It’s designed to support you beyond the therapy room by making your communication more consistent, grounded, and emotionally safe.
💬 Why Weekly Check-Ins Matter
Big breakthroughs in relationships are great—but what really creates change is the small, consistent ways we show up for each other.
A weekly check-in helps you:
Stay emotionally aligned
Process feelings before they build into conflict
Practice skills like validation and active listening
Share appreciation and repair from the week before
Create a screen-free space for connection
🗓 The Couples Communication Check-In
Here’s how to structure your check-in using tools from the starter pack, which is available in our ShopMy store:
🕯 Set the Mood
Light a massage candle to signal that it’s time to be present with each other. Let the scent shift the energy, and close the check-in with a calming, nurturing massage using the warm wax.
📚 Bring Insight
Read one chapter each week from Attached (to understand your attachment styles) or I Hear You (to improve validation and communication). Share one takeaway to kick things off.
📓 Reflect During the Week
Use a couples journal to jot down thoughts, therapy takeaways, or things you’d like to revisit in conversation. It helps keep the check-in intentional rather than reactive.
💬 Start with a Prompt
Use the Get Closer card deck to open the conversation. These thoughtful prompts are great for breaking the ice or getting past surface-level chats.
⏳ Keep it Focused and Present
Use a screen-free hourglass timer to hold space for 20–30 minutes of uninterrupted time. You can also leave the hourglass out in the open during the week to gently signal you’d like to connect.
✨ A Therapist’s Take
This check-in is something I regularly recommend to clients in couples therapy because it works. It creates structure without rigidity, intimacy without pressure, and communication that actually feels good. Whether you’re in the early stages of a relationship or years into a partnership, making space for regular, reflective conversations can make a meaningful difference.
🛒 Want to get started?
You can find all the tools I recommend—including the books, candle, journal, card deck, and hourglass—in my curated ShopMy collection.
You don’t need perfect words—just a shared intention to show up.
Interested in couples therapy?
We offer relationship counseling both in person and virtually. Learn more about working with us here.
